Reading was ball ache

I had a deep sense of foreboding as soon as I heard that the orange car park was closed. They changed it to camping as some bits of fields where muddy. So I had to drive to a farm in the arse end of Oxfordshire just to get parked. The walk about a mile. Ferry across the themes, then set up tent etc. the other thing that made me want to punch a baby was the queue for the ferry. Mean fiddler or festival republic whatever they are called really didn’t organise it well at all. I’m sure there must be some reason why they couldn’t build a bridge. But I'm sure they could have bribed the rivers commission or whoever to do it. 2-hour queue for a 20 second ferry trip. Wankers. They build bridges over the motorway at download and the farnbro air show. And they must easily be tall enough for the biggest of themes boats to go under. Perhaps its something to do with twats jumping off it. Possibly the stupid risk assessment people. I would say “cursed litigation culture” but that would make me a hypocrite as I have sued two people in my time (so far). The festival was around 28 degrees and that is far too fucking hot for me. So I didn’t go anywhere on the Saturday just sat under my freebee umbrella-ella-ealla and drank. Only when I got home I realised I didn’t Evan bother going to the shops in green camp. I didn’t Evan go to the main entrance. I walked around the shops in the arena but in a way I treated it like a stroll round the shops at lunch, not really looking to buy anything, just something to do for a walk. A few people where amazed that I knew where certain camps where and where places where that I hadn’t been to this year. The festival has almost become like a town that hardly changes and you know where everything is. 8th festival in 9 years suppose that’s the way it’s going to be. One thing is there is far less stuff than when I first started going. There was the virgin tea tent, opal fruits tent, n64, bungee jump, vert ramp. there was lost of stuff to do and see, almost seems like a shell of what it once was. There was a fair there and the silent disco. But that just seems to me like stuff for kids. Silent disco is a bit of novelty and fairs I have never liked. I got my festival bad guts and had to stuff myself with Imodium (like normal) also got given a dog that I had to attactch to my belt I chundered on the camp fire after drinking listereen. All the ingredients where there but they didn’t add up to more than the sum of there parts. I know chizz is going to say “ohh its coz I want there stop being a fag, get a ticket” but it just was full of 16 year old emo-chavs. Getting drunk on white lightning well its not Evan that now is it its that pear cider. Witch is actually babyshame, the company rebranded it. so all you people drinking it your drinking babyshame with a different label on it, feeling big and macho now are you in spoons? It’s was also the first reading I have almost ever got in a fight. Some kid tried to push in. but he was pushing in totally the wrong way and he was pushing into a barrier, I pointed this out and he got infort of me and stopped walking. And there was about 200 people behind me and I just waked forwards into him. And he told me to stop pushing and started to walk backwards. As the crowed surged forwards and I touched him again he turned around and pushed me saying I should be ashamed pushing when I was 30. Luckily that’s a little way off. And I have never in the last 20 years been mistaken for being older than I am. The line-ups for kids, its full of kids, it’s not for the festival go’er anymore. The headliners that I suppose where for the festival go’ers had smaller crowds than the likes of fall out boy and shit like that. They evan clashed jimmy eat word and ash. Another year will be the 10th anniversary of my first reading, but it will put me about 10 years older than 80% of the people there. I’m going to need some convincing.