Phone rings “hello can I ask you some questions about contact lenses” “um yeah, what it about?” “Its just a few questions” “ok… what are you a marketing company or a customer” “oh it’s a survey” “right” “it will only take a minuet” “go on then” “who many lenses have you fitted this month?” “”What new customers or check ups” “dunno? Suppose new?” “1 or 2 I think” “what would you like me to put?” “I don’t mind” “well I'm no allowed to interpret any of your answers, oh by the way this is being recorded” “right, well put down 2 then” “what percentage of them was 1 day lenses” “one of them was one days” “so what percentage is that?” “ohh 50%” “and what percentage was toric” “50%” “and what percentage was GP?” “huh? 0%” “and what percent was…” “well all the rest are going to be 0 mate” “right ok well I’m not allowed to interpret your answers in any way” “how many more categories are there?” “well 4, there is 7 in total” “well put them down as 0%. Hang on what would have happened if I had done 87 lens fittings would I have to have worked out all the individual percentages across all the 7 categories for you?” “umm well yes” “right. Ok what’s the next question?” “umm that’s it” “ohh good” “would you like my phone number?” “What? What for?” “just incase you have any questions.” “Questions? Like what” “I don’t know” “no its ok I don’t want your number”