Just not cut out for life



Im sure that in natural selection im the little fat one at the back with the gammy leg. If it weren’t for modern meds and torturing animals I wouldn’t be here. Probably my diet of beer bacon and Chinese take aways, doesn’t help. But the bacons grilled, the Chinese is with out MSG and cooked by a ti chi master, and the beer is crisp and cold. Mummmm beer.

But anyhoo I decided best do a bit of running about as my man boobies or moobes as I like to call them are getting bigger than an a cup, and stares are becoming in inconvenience. (Not relly). Golf relly wasn’t much exercise for a 26 year old. So badders it was. 6 months later and a few achy legs I was running around more and more so I upped it to twice a week. Now 3 month later a have popped in a few games of squash.
So the last week has gone. Fri, squash, Sunday squash, Monday badders, Tuesday squash, Wednesday badders, Thursday squash. Its Thursday and im supposed to be playing squash tonight. The only thing is ive destroyed my elbow. I could barely pick up the shopping. Witch consisted of a 2ltr bottle of water pint of milk and a newspaper. My health is a constant battle. Mouth ulcers, whitlows, head aches. Its almost is if I have radiation poisoning.

Can’t wait till they clone me a new body ill have my body back when I was 19. That way I can wreck it again. Wonder if they can give me a bigger pee pee.