Mouth pain and I quit the wrong time to stop sniffing glue
The title was just to make it sound more interesting than this post really is. Every now and a gain I get mouth ulcers or canker sores if you’re American. If you have never had one then you are lucky and I sagest you get on your knees and thank witch ever God you believe in. I here you saying “ohh harrys moaning coz he s got a little mouth sore….. What a big fucking crybaby. Lets give him something to cry about get the mail sack, live crabs and bat with nails in” alas I with it was one. At the moment I have 15. Smallest it about 1mm in diameter and largest is about 8mm. I’m pretty sure though that the five on the inside of my cheek are not long from merging like an evil power rangers baddy into 1 big ulcer the size of a 2 pence piece. Needless to say im not really looking forward to that. This happens to me quite a lot. And every time I go to the docs or the dentist they go “ohh yeah you have mouth ulcers” like I didn’t know. They pat me on the head and send me on my way, with my heart slightly more full of resentment for the world. Also in the case of the doctor the userly take some of my piss too. Fuck knows why. I recon they are piss vampires. Every time I go to the quacks they want some. Went there coz I has a dodgy foot. Piss sample. Allergy to insect bights, piss sample. They must have a lake of my urine by now. They probly spend weekends there swimming, basterds. Well anyway my toung is about twice the size its serposed to be. And the inside of my cheek is swollen. Both have ulcers on and they rub together every time I talk, swallow, chew, and breath. So im trying to to talk. “Hallelujah” I hear you cry.
The one customer I dint want to see came in. she’s deaf and she lip reads. I can barely move my mouth and I’m dyslexic. So I couldn’t relly communicate to her at all. Lucky she just now thinks I’m a bit simple as all I could do was read what she wrights and I can nod my head. But it still took 10 to get across that she wanted contact lenses and what her name was. The hardest part was me saying they'll be her Saturday and how much they where. Also in my pain I also said I’d phone her when they are ready. Lucky she didn’t notice. Because she might think I really was being a rude fucker.
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Saturday, May 19, 2007
like fater like son
Please note I cannot be held responsible for any mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, karma, dharma, metaphysical, religious, philosophical, Logical, Ethical, Aesthetical, or financial damage caused by this post
at work i was dishing out some glasses to a bloke and they where designer. and as desiner things go most have cases bags and other crap paper things. infact half a rain forist full acompanys your perchase.
me "fit ok?"
him "lovly. relly pleased with them"
me " because they are desinger you also get this poincey bag"
he pauses for a second. then i relise hes gay. he lokes desiger stuff espesaly the daft bag. and i have just insulted him to the very core of his being.
i go and tell my father just incasese there is any repucushons. terns out hes the reseptionisets next door nabour. my old man has a bit of a chuckle and tells me to be a bit more carful when im talking
he shouts
"theres a time bandit out side!!!" pointing at a person of diminuitive stature
Please note I cannot be held responsible for any mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, karma, dharma, metaphysical, religious, philosophical, Logical, Ethical, Aesthetical, or financial damage caused by this post
at work i was dishing out some glasses to a bloke and they where designer. and as desiner things go most have cases bags and other crap paper things. infact half a rain forist full acompanys your perchase.
me "fit ok?"
him "lovly. relly pleased with them"
me " because they are desinger you also get this poincey bag"
he pauses for a second. then i relise hes gay. he lokes desiger stuff espesaly the daft bag. and i have just insulted him to the very core of his being.
i go and tell my father just incasese there is any repucushons. terns out hes the reseptionisets next door nabour. my old man has a bit of a chuckle and tells me to be a bit more carful when im talking
he shouts
"theres a time bandit out side!!!" pointing at a person of diminuitive stature
Friday, May 18, 2007
embarrising things at work
there is one thing you can do in my job that makes may heart stop. its an instent wich explodeds then dies away slowly when your brain starts the prosses of how to get away with what you have just done. snapping peoples glasses in half infrount of them. glasses are quite an expencive item for there size. and people relly dont like it when the brake. in my 7 and a half year of being an optician i have probubly done it 5 or 6 times. its a hazard of the job. say i fix and adjust 5 to 15 pairs of specs a day and i have only broken 5 or 6 pairs. i would say im quite good at my job, im defnatly brakeing less that 1%. but thats absoultly no consalation to the persons glasses you do it to. the thing that always suprises me is the sound it makes. its makes a kind of "POP" very diffrent to when i have intentionly broken old pairs. its seems this little pop some how triigers the sudden dredd i feel when i have to go and told someone i have broken there £800 platunum verifocals hand made by angels in the fire of mount doom on the atority of the dark lord salron himself. i've not made anyone cry yet. but i snapped some kids pair inhalf today. i thought that was going to be that one when someone cryed. luckly the little guy dint seem to give a fuck. he seemed more intrested in his harry potter wand. then piped up with "now i can have some harry potter ones". luclky there not expencive. you as tax payers (and me) have to stump up the fee.
but all that is nothing in comparision to my job at jungle jungle menny yaers ago. its a kids "fun house". i was hung over and teh plase was packed with 2 to 8 year olds off there tits on shuger and artafishal colours. and one little chap kept hassling me to throw him in the ball pool. i was not rellyt suposed to touch children (not in that way) but basicly cos if i dint touch a child there was no way that i could get accused of anything etc etc... (im not a peado) this kid was hassling me like a kid that wanted a new power rander of pokimon or what ever the hell kids want. he hasseled me for about an hour and my hangover relly wasnt helping. he finaly got to me. so i picked him up under the arms lifted him about a foot off the ground and shove him backwards bum girst into the ball pool. this "throw " was smaller than he could have done kumping backwards. he ran off screaming and crying. i was summond to the mangers office and told that the boy had gone to his father and that the father had gone to the manager because i had given the kid carpet burn.
for some reason the rest of the people i worked with (peopel i was at collage with) found it helarous that i had given a 3 year old carpet burn in the ball pool
snapping glasses is nothing in comparision
there is one thing you can do in my job that makes may heart stop. its an instent wich explodeds then dies away slowly when your brain starts the prosses of how to get away with what you have just done. snapping peoples glasses in half infrount of them. glasses are quite an expencive item for there size. and people relly dont like it when the brake. in my 7 and a half year of being an optician i have probubly done it 5 or 6 times. its a hazard of the job. say i fix and adjust 5 to 15 pairs of specs a day and i have only broken 5 or 6 pairs. i would say im quite good at my job, im defnatly brakeing less that 1%. but thats absoultly no consalation to the persons glasses you do it to. the thing that always suprises me is the sound it makes. its makes a kind of "POP" very diffrent to when i have intentionly broken old pairs. its seems this little pop some how triigers the sudden dredd i feel when i have to go and told someone i have broken there £800 platunum verifocals hand made by angels in the fire of mount doom on the atority of the dark lord salron himself. i've not made anyone cry yet. but i snapped some kids pair inhalf today. i thought that was going to be that one when someone cryed. luckly the little guy dint seem to give a fuck. he seemed more intrested in his harry potter wand. then piped up with "now i can have some harry potter ones". luclky there not expencive. you as tax payers (and me) have to stump up the fee.
but all that is nothing in comparision to my job at jungle jungle menny yaers ago. its a kids "fun house". i was hung over and teh plase was packed with 2 to 8 year olds off there tits on shuger and artafishal colours. and one little chap kept hassling me to throw him in the ball pool. i was not rellyt suposed to touch children (not in that way) but basicly cos if i dint touch a child there was no way that i could get accused of anything etc etc... (im not a peado) this kid was hassling me like a kid that wanted a new power rander of pokimon or what ever the hell kids want. he hasseled me for about an hour and my hangover relly wasnt helping. he finaly got to me. so i picked him up under the arms lifted him about a foot off the ground and shove him backwards bum girst into the ball pool. this "throw " was smaller than he could have done kumping backwards. he ran off screaming and crying. i was summond to the mangers office and told that the boy had gone to his father and that the father had gone to the manager because i had given the kid carpet burn.
for some reason the rest of the people i worked with (peopel i was at collage with) found it helarous that i had given a 3 year old carpet burn in the ball pool
snapping glasses is nothing in comparision
Monday, May 14, 2007
Geek nostalgia, Eurovision and insest
Please note I cannot be held responsible for any mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, karma, dharma, metaphysical, religious, philosophical, Logical, Ethical, Aesthetical, or financial damage caused by this post
Friday was the release of command and conquer 3. I was a big fan of the games and I was please that the plot was following on from the tiberum time line (told you I am a geek). My little cold dead heart lit up when on the one of the first lvls I clicked on a unit and the sound clip played “YEAH!” I clicked on a building “I GOTTA PRESENT FOR YA!” BOOM, “THAT WAS LEFT HANDED”
If you know what im talking about you’re a geek too. And if you don’t have a Scooby then live safe in the knowledge you haven’t wasted your life and money on computer games. What I found strage is the 3 little sound clips I remembered from a game I played probably about 1995.
Saturday was Eurovision. Yes I know what your thinking hes written about video games now Eurovision. What kind of flagrant homosexual is he?!
Well there is a few “traditions” that we stared at collage and Eurovision is one of them. When we where to young to get into pubs we invented the Eurovision drinking game of death. The rules have changed over the years. But basically its drink when something funny happens. Funny being camp sarcastic dodgy outfit. Of a wardrobe malfunction. Eat food. Basically have a kitch cheap night with friends. We did try this game with spirets once and all I can say it was unpleasant for everyone concerned. Now we just play with larger and wine. But it is and exercise in speed drinking.
Lets face it we as a nation thing we are above eurovision anyway, so it supprises me when people moan that no one voted for us and that France only beat us alphabetically. All the western country’s who fund us seem a little bit resented as we buy are way into the finals and then don’t bother submitting a descent act. I was having a gander at wiki about the winner a strange dyke looking women that have lots of other women clutching at her and an odd love hart on there hands motif. She like a top selling artist In Serbia. Most of the eastern country submit there top acts and have to compeat to get there. And then the sit there voting for their nabours like grease and cypress always do. Yeah its lots of fun to watch and take the piss but we must remember that the song we enter we picked on its piss taking merits in the first place. If we think and act like we are above it then we shouldn’t take it to seriously. Terry wogan’s commenty is worth the licence fee.
Please note I cannot be held responsible for any mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, karma, dharma, metaphysical, religious, philosophical, Logical, Ethical, Aesthetical, or financial damage caused by this post
Friday was the release of command and conquer 3. I was a big fan of the games and I was please that the plot was following on from the tiberum time line (told you I am a geek). My little cold dead heart lit up when on the one of the first lvls I clicked on a unit and the sound clip played “YEAH!” I clicked on a building “I GOTTA PRESENT FOR YA!” BOOM, “THAT WAS LEFT HANDED”
If you know what im talking about you’re a geek too. And if you don’t have a Scooby then live safe in the knowledge you haven’t wasted your life and money on computer games. What I found strage is the 3 little sound clips I remembered from a game I played probably about 1995.
Saturday was Eurovision. Yes I know what your thinking hes written about video games now Eurovision. What kind of flagrant homosexual is he?!
Well there is a few “traditions” that we stared at collage and Eurovision is one of them. When we where to young to get into pubs we invented the Eurovision drinking game of death. The rules have changed over the years. But basically its drink when something funny happens. Funny being camp sarcastic dodgy outfit. Of a wardrobe malfunction. Eat food. Basically have a kitch cheap night with friends. We did try this game with spirets once and all I can say it was unpleasant for everyone concerned. Now we just play with larger and wine. But it is and exercise in speed drinking.
Lets face it we as a nation thing we are above eurovision anyway, so it supprises me when people moan that no one voted for us and that France only beat us alphabetically. All the western country’s who fund us seem a little bit resented as we buy are way into the finals and then don’t bother submitting a descent act. I was having a gander at wiki about the winner a strange dyke looking women that have lots of other women clutching at her and an odd love hart on there hands motif. She like a top selling artist In Serbia. Most of the eastern country submit there top acts and have to compeat to get there. And then the sit there voting for their nabours like grease and cypress always do. Yeah its lots of fun to watch and take the piss but we must remember that the song we enter we picked on its piss taking merits in the first place. If we think and act like we are above it then we shouldn’t take it to seriously. Terry wogan’s commenty is worth the licence fee.
At the erovision “party” I took along my littlest sister as she would be home alone. And I fear she would probably eat her own leg out of boredom. Her and me have a quite similar sense of hummer so when ever we go to gigs or watch I film together we have quite good banter. Some of my friends not knowing she was my sister told me after the party. That girl was well fit and we made are relly good couple.
She’s 15 and my sister
I felt a bit horrified to the core, that the first choice of females I know that my mates think I should be with is my sister
Friday, May 11, 2007
Luck heather and all the beacon I can eat,
Its has always been a point of amusement to my father that I have the café on speed dial. But I give them a buzz check my email, turn the kettle on and buy the time I walk there a nice bacon sandwege is ready for me, walk back to the shop and I can hear the kettle click off just as I walk in. (I did start to think the am routine was borderline OCD, but ive desided to shop thinking about it and right it off a convenient and efficient way of doing things). The guy in the café, I nice a nice Turkish bloke (not the guys from the Farnborough popins. Dose a mean fry up. He needed some glasses. And he was kinda grumbling about the cost. So I suggested a trade. So now I have a huge amount of credit in a café. Bacon is good.
Aldershot is a strange place. In the town centre there is this old woman dishing out “lucky heather” and she always trys to give it to me. I say give it more like she thrusts a twig in some tin foil at you, and demands money. “ Here love, have some luck”. I have always wanted to say “look LOVE you’re the one standing in the street stinking’ of piss trying to sell twigs, you look like you need all the luck you can get” I have never had the stones to say this to there face. One thing always confused me she all was goes for me. I know im a natural idiot magnet. But I thought after 6 or so year she might realise im not going to waste my sterling’s on a sprig of something she picked off of a roundabout. She always seemed to attack me on the way back from lunch as well like I was going to change my mind after eating. But she never ever looked at me like she recognised me. Then id notice that she be in a different street in the space of 10 mins. The first time ever I relised the has a twin. I saw them standing next to each other for the first time. To me this almost felt like the revelation at the end of a movie, obously if was much less exciting and had the aroma of ammonia. Then I thought how unlucky do you have to be to be twins and stinkin’ of piss selling twigs. I think they should get out of the luck trade and keep some for themselves.
Aldershot local paper headline HALF PRICE DRUGS FLOOD TOWNCENTRE
What an advert. Or then again it could be a biblical flood of opiates
Its has always been a point of amusement to my father that I have the café on speed dial. But I give them a buzz check my email, turn the kettle on and buy the time I walk there a nice bacon sandwege is ready for me, walk back to the shop and I can hear the kettle click off just as I walk in. (I did start to think the am routine was borderline OCD, but ive desided to shop thinking about it and right it off a convenient and efficient way of doing things). The guy in the café, I nice a nice Turkish bloke (not the guys from the Farnborough popins. Dose a mean fry up. He needed some glasses. And he was kinda grumbling about the cost. So I suggested a trade. So now I have a huge amount of credit in a café. Bacon is good.
Aldershot is a strange place. In the town centre there is this old woman dishing out “lucky heather” and she always trys to give it to me. I say give it more like she thrusts a twig in some tin foil at you, and demands money. “ Here love, have some luck”. I have always wanted to say “look LOVE you’re the one standing in the street stinking’ of piss trying to sell twigs, you look like you need all the luck you can get” I have never had the stones to say this to there face. One thing always confused me she all was goes for me. I know im a natural idiot magnet. But I thought after 6 or so year she might realise im not going to waste my sterling’s on a sprig of something she picked off of a roundabout. She always seemed to attack me on the way back from lunch as well like I was going to change my mind after eating. But she never ever looked at me like she recognised me. Then id notice that she be in a different street in the space of 10 mins. The first time ever I relised the has a twin. I saw them standing next to each other for the first time. To me this almost felt like the revelation at the end of a movie, obously if was much less exciting and had the aroma of ammonia. Then I thought how unlucky do you have to be to be twins and stinkin’ of piss selling twigs. I think they should get out of the luck trade and keep some for themselves.
Aldershot local paper headline HALF PRICE DRUGS FLOOD TOWNCENTRE
What an advert. Or then again it could be a biblical flood of opiates
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
Bank holls…. And evil fax machines
Everyone else’s bank Holladay starts the second that they kick out of work on Friday. Sadly I work Saturdays so it’s still a school night. So I had to be a little careful not to over indulge in the beer whiles seeing Richard herring (http://www.richardherring.com/) in a word it’s was brilliant. If you get the chance go see him.
Saturday I was still on a bit of a high from the fun of the herring gig. And was going to Spiderman 3. When I had another panic attack. It was my 3rd one ever. It lasted a good few hours and well into the film. It strange I hope I don’t have anymore.
Spiderman was amazing I don’t care what anyone has to say it was good nuff said. (if you couldn’t tell everyone I have spoke too hates it)
It has to be brilliant
1.Its Spiderman
2.Its directed by Sam Raimi
3.Its got Bruce Campbell in it
And lets face it every film would be better if Bruce Campbell was in it. I throw don’t the gauntlet to anyone. Email me hazbo@hotmail.com and give me a film. And ill tell you how it would be a better film if Bruce were in it.
Also I had the (mis)fortune to see a film called ATOMIC TRAIN (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0144039/) I have to say this is one of the strangest films I have ever seen. And I specialise in strange movies.
******Spoilers******
The hero in the film actually doses nothing. Every event that happens in the film would happen even if the character existed. The film is just a catalogue of blunders culminating in a train crash. Water on chemicals a nuke going off, and owl making people fall off a motorbike. And a guy pulling a rope to save his son and falling down a mineshaft
******Spoilers end******
The film was pure cheese. And made me want to go and watch maniac cop (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0095583). At least that’s got Bruce Campbell in it.
Might as well mention I saw next as well coz that took the tally of films with nukes going off this weekend up to two
Tuesday
Bring
Me: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwww?
Chelle: harry?
Me: grunt?!!
Chelle: have I just woke you up?
Me: yep
Chelle: well you said you always sleep in and waste you days off. So get up and come an have a coffee.
Me:groan
Coffee is the opposite of sleep and I don’t like coffee. I’m pretty sure coffee tastes like rimming a goat.
Everyone else’s bank Holladay starts the second that they kick out of work on Friday. Sadly I work Saturdays so it’s still a school night. So I had to be a little careful not to over indulge in the beer whiles seeing Richard herring (http://www.richardherring.com/) in a word it’s was brilliant. If you get the chance go see him.
Saturday I was still on a bit of a high from the fun of the herring gig. And was going to Spiderman 3. When I had another panic attack. It was my 3rd one ever. It lasted a good few hours and well into the film. It strange I hope I don’t have anymore.
Spiderman was amazing I don’t care what anyone has to say it was good nuff said. (if you couldn’t tell everyone I have spoke too hates it)
It has to be brilliant
1.Its Spiderman
2.Its directed by Sam Raimi
3.Its got Bruce Campbell in it
And lets face it every film would be better if Bruce Campbell was in it. I throw don’t the gauntlet to anyone. Email me hazbo@hotmail.com and give me a film. And ill tell you how it would be a better film if Bruce were in it.
Also I had the (mis)fortune to see a film called ATOMIC TRAIN (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0144039/) I have to say this is one of the strangest films I have ever seen. And I specialise in strange movies.
******Spoilers******
The hero in the film actually doses nothing. Every event that happens in the film would happen even if the character existed. The film is just a catalogue of blunders culminating in a train crash. Water on chemicals a nuke going off, and owl making people fall off a motorbike. And a guy pulling a rope to save his son and falling down a mineshaft
******Spoilers end******
The film was pure cheese. And made me want to go and watch maniac cop (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0095583). At least that’s got Bruce Campbell in it.
Might as well mention I saw next as well coz that took the tally of films with nukes going off this weekend up to two
Tuesday
Bring
Me: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwww?
Chelle: harry?
Me: grunt?!!
Chelle: have I just woke you up?
Me: yep
Chelle: well you said you always sleep in and waste you days off. So get up and come an have a coffee.
Me:groan
Coffee is the opposite of sleep and I don’t like coffee. I’m pretty sure coffee tastes like rimming a goat.
After coffee I notsice it was windy it was super windy so I grabbed my kites and went to the common. It was so windy I didn’t have the stones so fly all 3.
1.Coz I dint want to brake my legs
2.Coz I don’t recon be could do much first aid if I did brake my legs
The wind was strong and I did a few involuntary jumps.(see above pic) Getting some good air. It was the first time I have flown in strong wing in about a year. And it felt good. Today however if feels like I have has each of my arms tired to a wild horse and they have been set off in different directions. My shoulders feel like they are on the front of my chest. This has probably done wonders for my posture.
So today it’s back to work and the odditys of Aldershot
I get into work and the new ink cartridges have arrived for the fax. Its my job to do with like that coz my boss is so technologically inept he is unable to even use a digital watch
It has taken me 4 weeks to track down the ink the fax needs coz it is some make that is unknown to the western world, how we came across it is a mystery to me. The thing however stores every fax I couldn’t print out because it had no yellow ink. Fuck knows why it needs colour ink to print back and white things out. When it has a black ink cartridge. So I pop in the ink. And its must have been so full of faxes it was just about to explode. It has been printing for about an hour. And im a starting to get angry. Coz I know the second it stops printing too thing are going to happen.
***** Ink low****** and the shop is going to be out of paper
ill have to get back on to http://sovet-fax-supplys.com/
C.N.P.S is up to 10
Friday, May 04, 2007
C.N.P.S and days i have lived
over the easter i watched a dvd by richard herring (whos new show im seeing tonight) in the show he talks about a game called C.N.P.S http://www.richardherring.com/cnps.php
the rules are basicly twisted obsessive compulsive disorder. my drunken mind desidd to half arsed play this game to see how far you could get without trying. 2 weeks passed an i was yet to spot a 1. and some more of my friends saw the DVD. the desided to play and they in a week were on 7 and 8. not to be out done i desided to make it harder formyself. i desided i was going to take a pic of evey plate in order then turn it into a monumentus flick book video going from 1 to 999. (i stared to worry myself) this picture challange i set myself have just made one of the most obsessive compulsive things i have ever herd of a bit more hardcore. as i can now no count anthing that i can get a pic of. so playing the game when driveing is now out of the option.
for weeks have passed and now i am looking for a 9. im shure there is some higher power tormenting me becase i know where a 10 11 12 and 13 are. and i keep seeing cars parked in rows in sequence. its shocking
days i have been alive #9,568 http://www.beatcanvas.com/daysalive.asp
days playing C.N.P.S #26
at this rate its going to be a long game. i hope i have the sence to give up. and not start playing it properly. but i fear i maybe passed that
over the easter i watched a dvd by richard herring (whos new show im seeing tonight) in the show he talks about a game called C.N.P.S http://www.richardherring.com/cnps.php
the rules are basicly twisted obsessive compulsive disorder. my drunken mind desidd to half arsed play this game to see how far you could get without trying. 2 weeks passed an i was yet to spot a 1. and some more of my friends saw the DVD. the desided to play and they in a week were on 7 and 8. not to be out done i desided to make it harder formyself. i desided i was going to take a pic of evey plate in order then turn it into a monumentus flick book video going from 1 to 999. (i stared to worry myself) this picture challange i set myself have just made one of the most obsessive compulsive things i have ever herd of a bit more hardcore. as i can now no count anthing that i can get a pic of. so playing the game when driveing is now out of the option.
for weeks have passed and now i am looking for a 9. im shure there is some higher power tormenting me becase i know where a 10 11 12 and 13 are. and i keep seeing cars parked in rows in sequence. its shocking
days i have been alive #9,568 http://www.beatcanvas.com/daysalive.asp
days playing C.N.P.S #26
at this rate its going to be a long game. i hope i have the sence to give up. and not start playing it properly. but i fear i maybe passed that
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
One thing happens to me with freighting regularity. Is when I go to wash my hands I turn on the tap and water threw some amazing physics defying fluke goes all over my trousers make me look like im incontinent. a shimmeing jet of water dive strate for my famly jewls, and i have to spend an hour or so trying to conseal the wet patch. The fun places this happens is always when im out trying to impress a female. But today its happened at work witch is always fun. One of my friends dubbed me haphazard Harry yesterday. And she has not known me all that long.
What a reputation to have……. sigh
What a reputation to have……. sigh
Friday, April 27, 2007
Vegetarians and how they secretly lust the entire destruction of mankind
Veggies are the only consumptions of veggies. But in the growing of veggies the vast use of pesticides are used to keep their beans and stuff healthy and not nibbled by greenfly. These green fly would have bean eaten buy bigger bugs or by bird or then intern after the bigger bugs mice voles weasel and stoats. Thus being the start of the food chain. With in the end leads to us. By cutting out these middle animals they are narrowing the variation of complex molecules consumed. The same effect as GM crops (more on them in a moment). This elimination of the bugs stops the animals in the food chain from growing and existing and will eventually lead to there deaths playing havoc with are delicate eco system. Thus narrowing the verity of food for everyone else not just the cousin marring ranks. Ergo the population of the world will perish. The pesticides these twisted people use also are getting too dangerous proportions for humans. (As reported recently in the national press) let alone the wild life that eats them. Slowly and insidiously destroying life. GM crops are just a quicker and more effective way of doing this. As the general populous uncover there evil ways the strive to come up with greater weapons in there arsenal. Under the guise of fitter healthier more productive crops. They are narrowing the gean pool in plans as well. Witch will lead to the deaths of millions of plant animals and humans. Leaving the earth a baron desalt wasteland.1
Veggies are the only consumptions of veggies. But in the growing of veggies the vast use of pesticides are used to keep their beans and stuff healthy and not nibbled by greenfly. These green fly would have bean eaten buy bigger bugs or by bird or then intern after the bigger bugs mice voles weasel and stoats. Thus being the start of the food chain. With in the end leads to us. By cutting out these middle animals they are narrowing the variation of complex molecules consumed. The same effect as GM crops (more on them in a moment). This elimination of the bugs stops the animals in the food chain from growing and existing and will eventually lead to there deaths playing havoc with are delicate eco system. Thus narrowing the verity of food for everyone else not just the cousin marring ranks. Ergo the population of the world will perish. The pesticides these twisted people use also are getting too dangerous proportions for humans. (As reported recently in the national press) let alone the wild life that eats them. Slowly and insidiously destroying life. GM crops are just a quicker and more effective way of doing this. As the general populous uncover there evil ways the strive to come up with greater weapons in there arsenal. Under the guise of fitter healthier more productive crops. They are narrowing the gean pool in plans as well. Witch will lead to the deaths of millions of plant animals and humans. Leaving the earth a baron desalt wasteland.1
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Time dialation, evolution and angry drivers.Time fly’s when your having fun. Well yeah maybe but I recon fun doesn’t last that long, the opposite is true when you are late. You rush and rush and you get to work 5 mins late after running driving and juggling everything you have to do just to get to work with some trousers on. You get there 5 mins late. You don’t even get in trouble. But you have cursed yourself. Time now passes unnaturally slowly for the rest of the day. Making 1 hour at work seem like a week. And every time you look at the clock thinking it must be almost lunch and it still only 10am a little part of your soul dies.
A theory I have had for a long time is that pens evolve into traffic cones. You have you biro and the suddenly its gone, the little fucker has metamorphoses into a cone and its off to join the teaming shooles on the side of evey road I drive on. Just think about pens always disapear, cones are always apearing. In short biros and the larvai of trafic cones. I don’t wish to bang on about this any further, coz im in danger of going into my “vegatarens secrety lust for the destrution of the human race” and “ you nuts being an external organ proves the existence of god” rants and they are quite frankly fo another day.
Sitting at work and car skreeches to a hult and the driver jumps out and starts shouting at the bus driver behind him they exchange heated words and colourful language. Then the bus driver desides it tine to get on and take the poor sods in his bus to the station. When the guy stands infront of the bus Tanaman Square (sp?) Style. The bus drive desides to back up and then go for it. The driver in his early 50’s jumps and grabs onto the window of the bus. He clings there as the bus zooms off up the road at 30mph. (I have fallen off something at that speed and I know it relly fucking hurts and you don’t end up with much skin on you back left). It the goes round a roundabout in busy traffic. Before it is stopped by the police.
Just a normal day in farnbrough
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
sound of drilling part 2 :no drilling
well it was time to have my crazy metal tempry crown taken offa dn my new uber expencive one fitted. and to be part of my body for the rest of my days. now dentists dont have the problem i have. i get old people come in and i cant shut them up. the talk about there eys then they talk about someone they knows eyes then there family, then the war. you just cant stop them. the good old teath drillers are lucky coz no a lot of people can talk when you have pointy metal barbs in there mouth.
" so probubly best you dont have any anestetic for this as it will be over quicker, if it is sensative then well stop and give you some"
"yeah fine" im of the genral opinion that id rather have the pain and it last 1 min than have 1 tenth of the pain and it last 3 weeks. coz with anisetic i will bigh myself it will tern into an ulser and it will hert for months.
the ners cant find somthing and then the dentist starts singing nesery rhymes. then the pain hits. its not unbareable . its just the exposed nerve to the cold air. as it dryes. the dentist is still singing rhymes. he manages to sing every one i know and the the nerse is thretting to punch him.
i have never had a medical preseder with pain nersey rhymes and threts of violence before it was very strange.
but to my amazment my new crown is such a good job it looks like nothing has ever happend. feels like part of my mouth already.
well it was time to have my crazy metal tempry crown taken offa dn my new uber expencive one fitted. and to be part of my body for the rest of my days. now dentists dont have the problem i have. i get old people come in and i cant shut them up. the talk about there eys then they talk about someone they knows eyes then there family, then the war. you just cant stop them. the good old teath drillers are lucky coz no a lot of people can talk when you have pointy metal barbs in there mouth.
" so probubly best you dont have any anestetic for this as it will be over quicker, if it is sensative then well stop and give you some"
"yeah fine" im of the genral opinion that id rather have the pain and it last 1 min than have 1 tenth of the pain and it last 3 weeks. coz with anisetic i will bigh myself it will tern into an ulser and it will hert for months.
the ners cant find somthing and then the dentist starts singing nesery rhymes. then the pain hits. its not unbareable . its just the exposed nerve to the cold air. as it dryes. the dentist is still singing rhymes. he manages to sing every one i know and the the nerse is thretting to punch him.
i have never had a medical preseder with pain nersey rhymes and threts of violence before it was very strange.
but to my amazment my new crown is such a good job it looks like nothing has ever happend. feels like part of my mouth already.
Saturday, April 21, 2007
its 9.50 is so i have been at work for 50 mins.
i have upset jeramy clarksons aunt.
an riped a big hole in the arse of my trousers.
only 4 hours 10 mins to go till i can go and buy some more trousers.
as of wrighting this. a very atractive young lady has come in. and i had to move about the shop in a way that was to atleast try to conseal the sight of my pants. and then i asedenty pushed the wrong button on the credet card machine. and chaged her 199 insted of 119.
im so smooth
i have upset jeramy clarksons aunt.
an riped a big hole in the arse of my trousers.
only 4 hours 10 mins to go till i can go and buy some more trousers.
as of wrighting this. a very atractive young lady has come in. and i had to move about the shop in a way that was to atleast try to conseal the sight of my pants. and then i asedenty pushed the wrong button on the credet card machine. and chaged her 199 insted of 119.
im so smooth
Friday, April 20, 2007
things like this hapen to me all the time
ok now im a geek. i play videogames alot. a few years aboy metal gear solid 3 came out, and about a week before my playstation 2 dies. so i never got to play it. i didnt buy a new ps2 as i had and xbox. but i always wanted to get around to playing it at some point
now i have my shiny new ps3. i check the backwards compatabilaty list. and only the special edition version of mgs3 plays for some reason. ok fine. im shure i will stumble on a second had copy at some pont. that some pont was at lunch yesterday. ltd ed with good disks. price £27.99. the game was 2 sterlings more when it was brand new. but its the only ltd copy i have seen in years. i looked on amazon and they where selling second hand copys same price. ohh well i thought. always trade it in after if i get a bit skint,
i get home set up my ps3. ****** there is a new update 1.6 to 1.7***** right i go to the shops and grab me a six pack. (beer ok im not feeling up men). get home install the update. brill im ready. riped the lid off a cold one, sip the throth, and stick in the disk. silence
****this game is not compatable with the 1.7 version****
ok now im a geek. i play videogames alot. a few years aboy metal gear solid 3 came out, and about a week before my playstation 2 dies. so i never got to play it. i didnt buy a new ps2 as i had and xbox. but i always wanted to get around to playing it at some point
now i have my shiny new ps3. i check the backwards compatabilaty list. and only the special edition version of mgs3 plays for some reason. ok fine. im shure i will stumble on a second had copy at some pont. that some pont was at lunch yesterday. ltd ed with good disks. price £27.99. the game was 2 sterlings more when it was brand new. but its the only ltd copy i have seen in years. i looked on amazon and they where selling second hand copys same price. ohh well i thought. always trade it in after if i get a bit skint,
i get home set up my ps3. ****** there is a new update 1.6 to 1.7***** right i go to the shops and grab me a six pack. (beer ok im not feeling up men). get home install the update. brill im ready. riped the lid off a cold one, sip the throth, and stick in the disk. silence
****this game is not compatable with the 1.7 version****
Saturday, April 14, 2007
Please note I cannot be held responsible for any mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, karma, dharma, metaphysical, religious, philosophical, Logical , Ethical, Aesthetical, or financial damage caused by this post
Saturday morning thin smile time again. Doing my before work rounds paper CHECK, water CHECK, raspberry’s CHECK. One stop left, for a bacon sand wedge. Choice of 3 shops. Greg’s bacon cooked a month ago and marg in a dry bap. The deli. Sometimes cooked fresh sometimes bacon is kept walm. In my opinion bacon is best cooked on a griddle. So im thinking popins. Not been there in ages.
I walk in the whole place is wood and very smart and clean for a restaurant let alone a café. There is about 3 “chefs” and 5 waters. And the owner. All Turkish. They are all extremely smartly dressed. Waistcoats matching the color of the place. One rushes up and takes my order as im walking to the counter. The owner takes my dash and hes talking to what look like some regulars, about holidays or some idal chat. I waiting and I whip my phone out to return at txt. My spider sence is tingling. Theres a woman in her 50’s suddenly talking to the owner. I didn’t see he walk up to the counter so I have missed the first part of the conversation.
Woman “why are you loot working here, not bake in your own country…. You should go back to turkey”
My embarrassed smile hits, but im shure my eyes have a slightly panicked expression.
Woman “why are all you Turkish people here”
Owner in a broad Turkish acsent “ we are all English” and he give a cheeky smile
The lady rants abit more im to shocked to remember it
The owner still with a cheeky smile “ lady if you’re a raciest then fine im not because im English and im more English than you”
The woman says, “The day this country gets a black prime minister that’s the day this country is finished”
She walks out
The owner looks at me and the other customers “ I don’t want to be in turkey there’s too many bloody foreners there”
Saturday morning thin smile time again. Doing my before work rounds paper CHECK, water CHECK, raspberry’s CHECK. One stop left, for a bacon sand wedge. Choice of 3 shops. Greg’s bacon cooked a month ago and marg in a dry bap. The deli. Sometimes cooked fresh sometimes bacon is kept walm. In my opinion bacon is best cooked on a griddle. So im thinking popins. Not been there in ages.
I walk in the whole place is wood and very smart and clean for a restaurant let alone a café. There is about 3 “chefs” and 5 waters. And the owner. All Turkish. They are all extremely smartly dressed. Waistcoats matching the color of the place. One rushes up and takes my order as im walking to the counter. The owner takes my dash and hes talking to what look like some regulars, about holidays or some idal chat. I waiting and I whip my phone out to return at txt. My spider sence is tingling. Theres a woman in her 50’s suddenly talking to the owner. I didn’t see he walk up to the counter so I have missed the first part of the conversation.
Woman “why are you loot working here, not bake in your own country…. You should go back to turkey”
My embarrassed smile hits, but im shure my eyes have a slightly panicked expression.
Woman “why are all you Turkish people here”
Owner in a broad Turkish acsent “ we are all English” and he give a cheeky smile
The lady rants abit more im to shocked to remember it
The owner still with a cheeky smile “ lady if you’re a raciest then fine im not because im English and im more English than you”
The woman says, “The day this country gets a black prime minister that’s the day this country is finished”
She walks out
The owner looks at me and the other customers “ I don’t want to be in turkey there’s too many bloody foreners there”
Friday, April 13, 2007
the sound of drilling
a little while ago i and some of my komrades went for a spot of lunchon. in a foul stinking weatherspoons. yes i dont like 'spoons. they serve barralwash and microwave grade "F" mystrymeat. i was out voted so that where we went. i went i fancy a mixed grill. a mate pipes up with "na made you dont want that you'll brake your teeth on that" is langage commen to the avrage 'spoons patron i told him to ceese his idel pratter, and to let me order. (yeah ok.... i told him to shut the fuck up and stop being a silly cunt..... i wright this in cos im not shure how clear my spelling is being today). so i order my mix grill and they have there ecolii burgers. a few mouthfulls in i feel a twinge in my mouth. i cary on choping and i keep getting this funny feeling. not pain. just and odd feeling. "fuck i have broken my tooth" i go to the bathroom in the vage hope that im wrong. i look in the mirror my lover left mola is looking ok. i tough it. it splits neatly it two. i come back to the table looking sheepish. to the laughs gears and "i fucking told you so's". because it wa ssaterday i had no luck finding a dentist and had to go the weekend with trying not to eat or loose bits of my tooth. in the weeks that follow i have a tempy filling, proper filling to reconsuct, tooth brake some more, temp filling. x-rays. at this pont its basicly time for a crown, the detist slips in casualy that it £340 for the crown and i have already payed for all the other stuff on the list. also at the same time i had to pay dubble profesional fees to my govening optical body coz they are wankers but that a diffrent story.
crown time. well i dont hate the dentist. i just find it all a bit uncomftable. first of all there is the injections. then impressions, the more injections bucause i wasnt shure i was numb enough. then the drilling starts. drilling is ok. i just lay back and looka at the celing, problen is i cant help but want to swallow evey 20 seconds an i know hes going to be drilling in there for 10 mins. then he desides hes done coveing me in water and fragments of my teeth. and i can rince. clear is mouthwash when i spit it out is BLACK. black what the hell. swill around and spit again. black again. at this point i think its probubly best to not think about it. and lay back for some more drilling and then some more impressions. at least im getting my moneys worth. so then he pulls out the teeth equlelent of the dulux colour chart for teath so my crown can be made the same colour. it gose from bleach white to smoke dammage yellow. looking at it i want to be white everyone want to be white. i dont smoke, i dont drink coffee, brush at least 3 time aday. come one atleast only a quater of teh way down to yellow . i came deprellingly close to the half way point. then he had to read off this cde to the dental nerse he said "Yo3" im hopeing the y is nor for yellow but i know deep down it is. a meatal tempry crown is fitted wich is a crazy gold colour and looks a bit ganster. but sadly evertime i touch it with a fork or spoon. it feels like im haveing and electric stroke. i get out of the dentist with my face drooping and not shure how much of my black dribble im covered in. looking forward to 2 weeks time when they pull this metal from my head and put somthing in me with philosiocly could be a new part of my body.
i swich my phone on. txt from mat the person that cursed me when eating in the firts place. "hi buddy what you up 2?". "just got out of dentist in town dribbling" 2 mins later "be theer in 5 have to see this" he pitches up and asks me if i want to go get some lunch
a little while ago i and some of my komrades went for a spot of lunchon. in a foul stinking weatherspoons. yes i dont like 'spoons. they serve barralwash and microwave grade "F" mystrymeat. i was out voted so that where we went. i went i fancy a mixed grill. a mate pipes up with "na made you dont want that you'll brake your teeth on that" is langage commen to the avrage 'spoons patron i told him to ceese his idel pratter, and to let me order. (yeah ok.... i told him to shut the fuck up and stop being a silly cunt..... i wright this in cos im not shure how clear my spelling is being today). so i order my mix grill and they have there ecolii burgers. a few mouthfulls in i feel a twinge in my mouth. i cary on choping and i keep getting this funny feeling. not pain. just and odd feeling. "fuck i have broken my tooth" i go to the bathroom in the vage hope that im wrong. i look in the mirror my lover left mola is looking ok. i tough it. it splits neatly it two. i come back to the table looking sheepish. to the laughs gears and "i fucking told you so's". because it wa ssaterday i had no luck finding a dentist and had to go the weekend with trying not to eat or loose bits of my tooth. in the weeks that follow i have a tempy filling, proper filling to reconsuct, tooth brake some more, temp filling. x-rays. at this pont its basicly time for a crown, the detist slips in casualy that it £340 for the crown and i have already payed for all the other stuff on the list. also at the same time i had to pay dubble profesional fees to my govening optical body coz they are wankers but that a diffrent story.
crown time. well i dont hate the dentist. i just find it all a bit uncomftable. first of all there is the injections. then impressions, the more injections bucause i wasnt shure i was numb enough. then the drilling starts. drilling is ok. i just lay back and looka at the celing, problen is i cant help but want to swallow evey 20 seconds an i know hes going to be drilling in there for 10 mins. then he desides hes done coveing me in water and fragments of my teeth. and i can rince. clear is mouthwash when i spit it out is BLACK. black what the hell. swill around and spit again. black again. at this point i think its probubly best to not think about it. and lay back for some more drilling and then some more impressions. at least im getting my moneys worth. so then he pulls out the teeth equlelent of the dulux colour chart for teath so my crown can be made the same colour. it gose from bleach white to smoke dammage yellow. looking at it i want to be white everyone want to be white. i dont smoke, i dont drink coffee, brush at least 3 time aday. come one atleast only a quater of teh way down to yellow . i came deprellingly close to the half way point. then he had to read off this cde to the dental nerse he said "Yo3" im hopeing the y is nor for yellow but i know deep down it is. a meatal tempry crown is fitted wich is a crazy gold colour and looks a bit ganster. but sadly evertime i touch it with a fork or spoon. it feels like im haveing and electric stroke. i get out of the dentist with my face drooping and not shure how much of my black dribble im covered in. looking forward to 2 weeks time when they pull this metal from my head and put somthing in me with philosiocly could be a new part of my body.
i swich my phone on. txt from mat the person that cursed me when eating in the firts place. "hi buddy what you up 2?". "just got out of dentist in town dribbling" 2 mins later "be theer in 5 have to see this" he pitches up and asks me if i want to go get some lunch
Monday, April 02, 2007
Love bites, and fools
we had the bi annual ESFR paintball. witch basicly invols me trying to get some people to come. they say yes. get drunk the night before and can get up in the morning, we tern up. late and im some cases so drunk still thay are unable to talk, then we get shot by bigger boys with there own super hy power guns. needless to say we lost again, but i do love paintball.
yeasterday a guy on the winning went ohh there is a bit of mud on the end of my gun turned it around to look at it and pulled the trigger. shooting himself square in the face. well atleast he knows his maks works.
my misfortune was caused my me only houres before exclaming that id rather be shot in the testicals than in the throut, 6 mins into the first game. a paintball ant 300 foot persecond hits me in the windpipe. i was almost sick inside my mask. there is nothing like tempting fate. stitting here with a bruse tha looks like a love bite i cant help wondering if i said shoot me in the neck i never want to be shot in the stones. would i be sitting here and would i be sitting with a bag of ice.
the problem with a love bight its they are a total stupid thing. and have a bruse that looks like one is a bit frustrating. people complane about me at work for varouse stupid things, never for actuly anything i have done wrong. i had a minor bit of segery on my neck and it looked like a love bite for 6 weeks, and loads of people complaned to my boss about it, and evan said. stuff to me about it. so i just hope it goes down quick. witch it wont. the most embarrasing time was when i worked at a kids wacky fun house place and used to sort out partys and stuff, and i had seen my girlfriend at the time before i went to work, and at work some kid jumped of wome of the play fome climing things at me and grabbed the whissel that was on a cord around the neck. so i suddleny almost got garotted by a 3 year old, leaning a nice bruse and scrape on my neck. went home to the girlfriend. "a kid did it honest" that was a difficalt evning
i had a guy come in my shop today and asked if he could pay his t.v licesnce. if he hed hed cash i would have let him. he said the post office told him to come to my opticians.
20 mins later a woman comes in asking if i do a photocopying service. i give her the directions to a place in town and she askes me how much it costs. im am opticain i said i dont work at the copy place i just know where it is. so you wont copy this for me? i tell her where the place is and she looks at me in the way that only crazy people can and leaves.
odd morning relly
Saturday, March 31, 2007
dont you just with you had sky plus or that remote control from that adam sandler film sometimes? my problem is that when some one is rude to me basicly i can do nothing apart from give a thin smile and look blank. butas soon as they are gone 1001 witty comebacks spring into my head. im shure this is the same for a lot of people. unless im drunk, then im quite good at awsering back, as stituation that could mean my new blog is from a recover ward if the persons threts are to be taken littrly. but will find out how that goes tonight.
so a super store has a pollicy to open a new checkout if there is more that 3 people in the que. serposed to be helpfull but its not relly, by the time they are threw the "star up prosedure" for the till. the que you where in is gone. but there was two tills open bouth with a que of 3 in each. the guy at the back of the slightly shorter que is an man late 50 probubly and buying wine and sherry at 8:45am. so i join the slightly longer que, slightly influenced also by the facked that it is a nice looking female doing the job. Over the tannoy booms , "JONNY COME AND OPEN CHECKOUT 5" andf some adolesent scurrys out from somwhere and strats trying to open the till. "do you want to come around?" i go to the newly opening till. i get shuved in that back by the old man and he goes "im first in the que" and wacks me again "IM FIRST IN THE QUE". thin smile time as i look at him and go ok. im holding a bottle of water and a news paper. then the guy starts to argue with the poor lad abot the wording on the sign that 25% off wine. the que the old git left has no got the last person packing. the orgonal que i was in is on the last person. all the staff are giving each other odd looks as this man is ranting on and trying to be padantic. the he leaves 2 bottles of wine at the till and leaves with the sherry. witch i thought was a bit strange coz he tripple bagged it. i still have a thin smile and look blank untill i make the 5 steps to the door. then ping
"look sir your not first in the que there is no que, you are forming a que by standing behind me, if you asked me could you go first because you are in a hurry to get what ever alcaholic brakefast you need before you can cope with task of being a misrable old cunt, then i would have let you go first. but mearly exclameing you are first in the que doesnt make that so"
sounded alot better in my head...
so a super store has a pollicy to open a new checkout if there is more that 3 people in the que. serposed to be helpfull but its not relly, by the time they are threw the "star up prosedure" for the till. the que you where in is gone. but there was two tills open bouth with a que of 3 in each. the guy at the back of the slightly shorter que is an man late 50 probubly and buying wine and sherry at 8:45am. so i join the slightly longer que, slightly influenced also by the facked that it is a nice looking female doing the job. Over the tannoy booms , "JONNY COME AND OPEN CHECKOUT 5" andf some adolesent scurrys out from somwhere and strats trying to open the till. "do you want to come around?" i go to the newly opening till. i get shuved in that back by the old man and he goes "im first in the que" and wacks me again "IM FIRST IN THE QUE". thin smile time as i look at him and go ok. im holding a bottle of water and a news paper. then the guy starts to argue with the poor lad abot the wording on the sign that 25% off wine. the que the old git left has no got the last person packing. the orgonal que i was in is on the last person. all the staff are giving each other odd looks as this man is ranting on and trying to be padantic. the he leaves 2 bottles of wine at the till and leaves with the sherry. witch i thought was a bit strange coz he tripple bagged it. i still have a thin smile and look blank untill i make the 5 steps to the door. then ping
"look sir your not first in the que there is no que, you are forming a que by standing behind me, if you asked me could you go first because you are in a hurry to get what ever alcaholic brakefast you need before you can cope with task of being a misrable old cunt, then i would have let you go first. but mearly exclameing you are first in the que doesnt make that so"
sounded alot better in my head...
Friday, March 30, 2007
well a dear old friend of my has convinced me to start a blog. im wish its was because hes intressed in what im upto, but basicly its coz the combenation of my hapless life and spelling make him wet himself. so the guildlines that i have come up for my blog are i will not relly spell check, unless i relly cant make a word look like its suposed to. only right about true stuff thats happend to me. fight crime and protect the innosent.
so ill kick things off with the events of last weekend
i was visiting a friend and over the corse of the day we consumed a lot of alcahol. and im get a bit loud when i have had a few glasses of pop. She lives in a student house and a 17 year old waster had moved in and turend the place into a squat in 3 days. he tryed to talk to, but it became very clear that he was off his tits on somthing and didnt know what day of the week it was. he desided to try to have a witt put down banter with me. in shourt i convinced him that its was wednessday and hes was late, he was relly putting carpet in the joint he was rolling, and one of his friends has "fired of some knuckle-children" in his bed. Imature i know but i was pissed and coulnt help myself. and eveyone else thought it was funny. so then it was bed timei asked may mate is she could get me a glass of water as i was a but dehydrated from drink etc. i went of and polished my knashers and got ready for snoozy time. came back in the room and ther was a mug. "thanks mate" GLUG GLUG ....... GLU....... "what the fuck are you doing?!!!" then the taste hits me....... i swallow hard as im about to vomit. "what the hellis that?" "ITS CAREX you loon" i read someware yaer ago that the mix liquid soap with stuff that makes you vomit so kids dont eat it. and basicly that and beer was going to be a challange to keep down. worst of all the loo was next to the adolesent wasters. and id totaly lose my edge vomiting loudly next to them. for anyone who wants to know carex anti-bactral soap tastes like it smells only much stronger.
the next day after a tummy gergling sleep its mothers day and my friends perents vist. its the first time i have met them and they are being usherd into a drug den. so i try to seem polite and chatty to keep there minds of the squaller that there daughter is currently living it. after about an hour they invite me out for a meal with them. i declined as i still want shure weather i was going to be sick or not. so i go home. i sent a txt to my mate thanking her for the fun nightmake a joke about the soap and say im home safe. five mins later my phone beeps "you legend you where talking to my mum for an hour and a half with your flies undone"
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